Dark Web has begun! It has Venom, clones, mutants! Pretty much everything that would make a ’90s kid glee with joy. Unfortunately for me, I’m not a ’90s kid, so can even Jed MacKay save this story? We shall see. Good reader, let’s dive into this quick assessment of Dark Web: Mary Jane and Black Cat together!
Credit Where Credit Is Due
Story Title: Face It Tiger, I Just Hit the Jackpot (OK, not really. We were doing so well, but we are back to title-less issues again)
Writer: Jed MacKay
Artist: Vincenzo Carratu
Colorist: Brian Reber
Letterer: VC’s Ariana Maher
Cover Artists: J. Scott Campbell
Asst. Editor: Tom Groneman
Editor: Devin Lewis
Remedial Dark Web 101
Ben Riley fell into some psychic goop and turned into the Joker Chasm and his girlfriend became Harley Quinn Hallows Eve. Since he is a clone, he naturally gravitated to Goblin Queen who is an X-Men clone stuck in Limbo. They decided to redo Inferno (not the classic Dante text, but the ’90s X-Men crossover) and use the ensuing chaos to make Peter eat evil fruit. No, I am not making stuff up.
The Story – Pay Attention, This Will Be on the Test
Black Cat is swinging through the demon-infested streets of New York and decided that even though MJ is a rival of hers, she owes it to Peter to make sure MJ is OK. Turns out, MJ is holding her own and protecting Paul (he’s so perfect) and their children with her new slot machine powers. But even a super-powered model can’t completely defeat a demonized water tower, so Black Cat calls on Tony to send aid to Paul and children (because Tony still has a thing for MJ) and Felicia goes off to help MJ. MJ reveals to us that her powers are random and her new fire sword makes quick work of the demon. On their way back to the fam, they accidentally slip into Limbo where they are accosted by a few minor demons. MJ gains the power of Pudding-Girl and the fight ends when it is revealed that they are not there by chance, but rather because the demon Belasco has need of the world’s greatest thief.
OOTI (Onomatopoeia of the Issue)
On a scale of 1 (POW) to 10 (BLRKBQRKPQRBLNB), FASSSHH gets a 4. We only had three onomatopoeias to choose from and they were sadly lackluster. Really should have been a sound for MJ’s power spin or at least her pudding form.
Analysis
New Crew – Wow! New letterer, new associate editor, new editor – will this have any impact on Spidey going forward? I don’t know, folks. It does seem odd to me that for the big event, the normal editor is not present. That’s got to mean something, right? Those of you who keep track of what is going on behind the scenes might be able to clue me in so that I don’t go down some rabbit hole and end up with charts and such on the editorial process of the Spider Office.
MJ Super Powers – If you did not read the issue, then what happens is MJ “spins” and a slot machine screen appears. Based on the combination of items, she gets a certain power. She has no control over which powers she gets, but at least she has an immediate understanding of what her powers are (thankfully we’ll avoid a tragic mutant origin story every time she enacts the spin).
There are some pros and cons here. The pros are the random powers. I’ve often thought a hero like this would be fun to write/read. The fact that this in the hands of a solid writer like Jed MacKay will give us an interesting assortment of powers (like when she turned into a pudding form of Hydro-Man) is a major plus. Eventually, she will hit The Jackpot – who knows what powers that will give (give me your best guess in the comments). This is a form of the literary term ‘aptronym‘ where a person’s name reflects their occupation. We often get this with comics. Her, it’s not quite her name, but she is so associated with the term ‘jackpot’ that I’m making the call that it fits.
The cons are giving MJ powers. I liked the Beyond Black Cat and Mary Jane team-up because MJ is a capable individual without powers. I liked her being able to hold her own. The good news is that this is most-likely a short-term situation. Whatever happened, most-likely happened in the six-month mystery box, but it is interesting to note that while Paul knows her secret, Peter does not.
SO who exactly is this Belasco? Well, a quick Google search will tell you that he is famous for adapting Madame Butterfly for the theater, but I am nigh-positive that this is not the same skinless, but wearing human skin as garment demon we see in this issue. Give me a moment for a quick bit of research.
*moment passes*
OK, so it seems our friendly demon here is also known as Lord Belasco of the Corrupted. Nice. He was some powerful sorcerer a while back and made a pack with a demon to become even more powerful. He was to start a new race of human/demon hybrids to roam the earth (or something). Then, is a great call back to my buddy Dante, he kidnapped Dante’s beloved Beatrice to be the mom of this new race. Dante goes through what he thinks is hell to rescue her and ends up beating Belasco by hitting a pipe that had something akin to liquid nitrogen which put Belasco in suspended animation and also caused him to lose some powerful magic objects called the Bloodstones. He got better when a volcano warmed him up a bit and he regained the Bloodstones, only to lose them again and get trapped in Limbo. He then has several adventures related to mutants, mostly, and all of them ending with him having picked the wrong side. My best bet is that Belasco needs Black Cat to steal the Bloodstones back.
Extra Credit
A nice call back to the ’60d and ’70s – we get a pin-up (and yes, Chi-Town did buy multiple copies of this issue so that he could tear out the page and hang it up on his wall.
Extra-Extra Credit
OK, after writing that in the OOTI section, I now am wondering what would be a good sound for MJ moving around in her pudding form. Leave your response in the comments!
Final Grade
Jed MacKay is a fantastic writer and gets Black Cat like no one else. He was dealt a crummy hand and still managed to pull out some interesting moments. Despite his best efforts, the story matter beyond his control are still a bit overwhelming.
C+
Still the best Dark Web story we’ve had so far, though, and I think once the story gets going, I could see this easily moving into the B range.
But Wait! There’s More
We do get a fun little Black Cat story that involves fake time travel, Doctor Doom’s mask, and a poker game.
What’s Next?
Folks, I’ll be back next with ASM #16 because Peter made the schedule and well, that’s all I need to say. But if you are wanting all the other Dark Web issues in-between stop by over at Ryan “Pain Bot” Read’s review and he will fill you in on all the Ms. Marvel and Gold Goblin stories along with the regular Spidey books. My heart goes out to the poor soul.
Shameless Self Plug
Guys, I can/t leave you with this for the end of the year. Swing on by to my Cobwebs article where I review and over-analyze Marvel Team-Up #1, the Christmas issue.
‘Nuff Said!
Apple Podcasts
Google Podcasts
Spotify
Pandora
Amazon Music
iHeartRadio
Podbean
Amazon Alexa
Player.fm
Listen Notes
Stitcher
@Jack Brooks – Interesting theory that Wells doesn’t have the mystery box figured out before writing these other stories. It would explain why we aren’t getting fed a steady stream of clues other than it cost Peter MJ, he did something to tick off the other heroes (which we haven’t seen too much call back to), and Norman was the one who helped him. It would also explain something like MJ getting these powers, but not using them in the Hellfire Gala, unless she got them after the Gala. Man, I think you are on to something here. A whole _Lost_ approach to writing this mystery box. I don’t know how we would ever be able to prove it except for an interview years later, but I think you may just be right. At the very least, maybe Wells has a general idea of what happened, but not really flesh out yet.
“I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!”
=
“Zeb Wells at the time I wrote this still hadn’t decided what exactly happened, but the reveal has to be over in ASM whatever the reveal ends up being, so I can’t just tell you and instead I shall yell this at you like I have a leg cramp!”
B2BND > Back to Brand New Day year, for ASM. Where’s Paper Doll?
@Hallows Evan
Since we cannot include images in the comments, imagine the seagull or Vince McMahon meme:
1st box: SPLOOORRKLE
2nd box: Mary Jell-O
3rd box with laser eyes: The Proof Is in the Pudding
Friend, your title skills are unparallel. Absolute legend. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year back to you! I’m not touching that amulets thing.
@Mark — Well, I guess this renders moot my comment on a variant covers post a while back about how, while I appreciated seeing Mary Jane placed front and center among a group of superheroes, I wondered how those superheroes felt fighting with someone without any powers. I guess if I had read between the lines I could have guessed that she’d have powers, but given that the last Mary Jane and Black cat series had her without powers, it seemed a reasonable assumption that that would be the case here. At least those powers lend a bit of intrigue to the six-month mystery.
I don’t know if I can compete with Franz29, but my sound for MaryJell-O would be “SPLOOORRKLE.”
Speaking of which, my title for this issue is “The Proof is in the Pudding.”
(I always preferred Jell-O gelatin pops to the pudding pops, but the former are no longer made, to my knowledge.)
Have a merry Christmas and happy New Near, and may your amulets never tickle.
@Chi-Town and @Michael
Chi-Town – 🙂 and 🙂
Michael – I assumed the red-head comment just meant that he and Janine were together. Peter has MJ (red head) and Ben has Janine (red head). I didn’t read it as Black Cat having any real inside knowledge of what Ben and Maddie were up to. I know I read all the ASM issues, but I sure don’t remember Wayeb. I’ll have to re-read them before March. Here is a link to information on the real Wayeb: https://www.godchecker.com/maya-mythology/WAYEB/ As for the unexpected ally, your guess is on record. I’m going to go out on a limb and say Mephisto. My thought process is that Belasco is going for all of hell and Mephisto will be needed to stop him.
I meant, an explanation in issue 16.
One thing bothered me about this issue- at the start of the issue Felicia knew that Ben is working with a “redhead”. (Either Maddie or Janine.) How did she know that? Peter just found that out himself at the end of issue 15 right before Ben attacked. Maybe there will be an explanation in issue 15.
We FINALLY find out what happened during the 6-month gap in issues 21-22 in March. The villain is Wayeb- I had to google him to find out that he was that Mayan deity that Peter fought in issues 555-557. (I’m surprised anyone remembered him without googling.) Maybe MJ’s new powers have to do with Wayeb.
The solicits for issue 3 have Felicia and MJ teaming up with an unexpected ally- maybe Maddie regains some of her humanity by the end of Dark Web and they have to team up with her?
C+. The writing is good, the story for Zeb’s mystery box hurts. Even Mackay calls it out in dialog banter between MJ and Felicia. I like to point out a few things.
1) “MJ is holding her own and protecting Paul (he’s so perfect)” Shame on you. SHAME ON YOU.
2) “Chi-Town did buy multiple copies of this issue” No, I didn’t. Where do you get your sources from?
@Franz29 – I waivered between C+ and B-. Sounds like we are on the same page here. I don’t mind mystery boxes too much, but I want to be fed some clues. This isn’t just a side plot that we have time to figure out before the reveal, this is something that has changed the whole dynamic of the story. Until we get something to sink our teeth into, it feels a bit like a What If? to me. I also don’t mind the ‘not earned’ aspect because the way I see it, it was earned, we just haven’t seen why yet. Until the mystery is revealed, I will assume that their reactions were in line with what mystery happened. I know I am one of the few that see it that way – possibly the only one on the Crawlspace staff. 🙂
Pudding Lass is AWESOME! And that onomatopoeia is a 10 (the added ‘r’ really tips it over the edge for me). Come to the head of the class, Franz29 – you get an A++!
I haven’t read the Gold Goblin. I need to pull up Ryan’s review to find out what happened in it.
Good review again; as you say, the best issue of Dark Web so far, but honestly, not saying much there. I gave this a B- so not far off your grade for it. McKay managed to polish the t*rd that is DW for this one.
So Paul knows MJ has powers. I sure wish we knew more about it. How long has she had them? Where did they come from? Has she had them since the start of Wells’s ASM run? That’s the trouble with this mystery box approach. We just don’t have a context for what’s going on and it means the developments aren’t earned.
Onomatopoeia for “Pudding Lass”. I’m thinking Squeleearch 😉
I thought Gold Goblin was OK this week too, gave that a C+, but again developments happening off-panel that we don’t have a context for.