Spidey Kicks Butt: Spider-Man: Shush

Being a redneck with pretty simplistic views on law and order (not the TV shows, but the concept, although I do like the TV shows), one of my favorite movie series was always the “Dirty Harry” films with Clint Eastwood (except the 5th one – that sucked). For far too many people, law and order is a political issue full of misunderstood people who just need more hugs in their lives, rather than good guys vs. bad guys, but for those who can divorce their politics from their movie entertainment, the first film is a true classic of the police genre, partly because of the times in which it was filmed, and also because it has one of the creepiest, most disgusting, vile and irredeemable villains ever to grace the silver screen courtesy of the underappreciated Andy Robinson (who also turned in a superb job as the Cardassian Garak in the Star Trek: Deep Space Nine series).

And yes, this is going somewhere with Spider-Man, trust me.

The second and third Harry films are decent and still have some actual plots that move along underneath the violence. The 4th, Sudden Impact, although it is the second best of the series and one of the more enjoyable ones to watch, is what film critics Siskel & Ebert called a “cartoon distillation” of the character and the series, meaning that Harry simply goes out and shoots bad people. There is no subtlety, no underlying subtext, no commentary on the events of the day, just a plot that hits all the high points and pushes all the right buttons, with only disgusting one-dimensional bad guys for Harry to ventilate in any number of crowd pleasing ways.

Which brings us to one of the more anticipated Spider-Man titles in long time, Mark Millar’s Marvel Knights Spider-Man, or as it became known virtually from the beginning the title was announced – Spider-Man: Shush. Writer Millar indicated that the storyline would last the entire first year of the title, involve one of Spidey’s villains learning his secret identity and wrecking all sorts of havoc in his life, while a veritable potpourri of classic villains romped and stomped through the story. For many, this seemed eerily familiar to the recently completed Batman: Hush, which unfolded along similar lines. Of course, in the interim, the title Spider-Man: Shush has almost been completely co-opted by Sean Whitmore’s demented, yet hilarious Parody, to the point that many people think I’m referring to that parody instead of the actual story. Of course, if you haven’t seen the result of Sean’s borderline certifiable mental state, you should – AFTER you read my article!

Millar was a hot commodity after such efforts as The Authority, which took the idea of super powered teams and villains to its logical conclusion – a messy world with high body counts and huge swaths of destruction, Ultimate X-Men, and then The Ultimates which reimagined Marvel’s Avengers for the 21st Century and is consistently a top 5, if not a #1 seller (that is – whenever it came out – being a notorious victim of late shipments). With this hard-livin’ Scotsman’s pedigree, and the samples of lead characters and villain re-designs from the pencils of Terry and Rachel Dodson that were released, spider-fandom was foaming at the mouth like rabid dogs waiting for this series – and I include myself as one of the serial foamers. It also didn’t hurt the marketing of this title that the release of the first several pages from issue #1 brought howls from fans who saw it on the internet because it literally starts off with a bang and what appears to be a life altering event for Spidey – the defeat of the Green Goblin after a fierce battle, with the wall crawler leaving him webbed up for incarceration by the police. Of course, this seemed inconceivable considering Spidey’s tortured history of just what to do with the man who knows his secret identity. The problem was, as we now know, this story was beginning just after The Pulse storyline dealing with Norman Osborn’s public outing was starting. But The Pulse went bi-monthly soon after publication, significantly delaying the end of that story which would ultimately lead into Marvel Knights Spider-Man #1.

In many ways, the hype was justified. The first 12 issues of this title, which were broken down into three story arcs that each ran four parts (“Down Among the Dead Men,” “Venomous,” and “The Last Stand”) was the Spider-Man epic that many fans were craving. In fact, I hope I’m not so bold as to suggest that it’s the most epic Spider-Man storyline since the failed Clone Saga (“The Gathering of Five” and “Final Chapter” prior to the reboot, for example, tried to be epic, and failed miserably. The Clone Saga was truly epic, but boy did it crash and burn.) The stakes are high, the villains dastardly, the leading ladies are voluptuous, and the action is flat out balls to the walls in its intensity and impact as Spidey suffers one of his most brutal beatings ever, as well as put through an intense emotional ringer. Plus, this epic behaves like an epic should behave – with a finite time lime for completion and a seldom-wavering focus. Even during the middle of the tale when it seems like it tends to waver and bog down a bit, we knew that it was going to pick up because we knew exactly when it was going to end. Plus, when it ends, we’re not standing exactly in the same place we were when the story began. Oh, I will agree, there is more the illusion of change, than actual change (with the possible exception of the fates of Venom and Scorpion), but even though we perhaps wind up back close to the same place we were – we at least feel that we’ve been somewhere.

Without a doubt “Dead Men” is the strongest arc, as the storyline is initially established and builds to a frenzy. The middle part “Venomous” is a bit slower and sags at times, but by the time you’re ready to say “let’s get on with it,” “The Last Stand,” another action packed arc that gives us most of the answers raised in part 1, begins. Unfortunately, like with so many ambitious stories, the end does not quite seem to deliver everything promised. I wonder if some judicious editing could have effectively trimmed an issue or two from the tale, the bugs worked out, and then added the issue or two back with the additional exposition and action needed. Once Millar’s story finally wraps up, it leaves one feeling slightly schizophrenic. You find yourself caught in rapt attention and pure fanboy delight at its strengths, which are many, including several nods to the continuity obsessed (Millar relied on the guys at Spider-Fan to help with continuity issues), including references to characters and situations Marvel otherwise chooses to ignore (such as Ben Reilly, Baby May, clones, and the Spider-Mobile), and fun little tips of the hat such as the “Ditko Theater” where a vast congregation of supervillains attends the Venom auction. You also find yourself extremely puzzled over certain situations that seem contrived, out of character, or simply make very little sense at all (JJJ actually believing for one minute that his son could actually be Spider-Man, which we’ll discuss later, being one of the serious problems). Then there’s the revelation of the ultimate mastermind – which makes for a very good story and is totally logical considering what we know of the two principal characters involved – but still left a lot of people exasperated because it’s the same old mastermind behind a lot of other plots going on in the world of Spider-Man. In many ways, the first year of Marvel Knights Spider-Man really was indeed a “cartoon distillation” of Spider-Man, like “Sudden Impact” (so much so that some particularly critical fans are considering this to be the ultimate fanfic) was to Dirty Harry. Action, excitement, and thrills a minute, but when the merry-go-round stops, you’re still somewhat dissatisfied with the tale it has told.

Now, for simplicity and sanity’s sake – I’m writing this as if most of the audience has already read the story – so not only are there spoilers galore – but the article bounces all over the map.

Down Among the Dead Men

After the aforementioned titanic struggle with the Goblin, Spidey is hit by further whammies when (1) he discovers that Uncle Ben’s gravestone has been vandalized and that (2) one of his enemies now knows his secret identity and (3) poor old Aunt May has been kidnapped by the subject of (2)! All of this puts Spidey on edge and compromises his good judgment in more than one instance, culminating in an exceptionally nasty fight with both Electro and the Vulture, hospitalizing him in serious condition. If that wasn’t bad enough, he is accidentally shot by the police while the Vulture is using him as a human shield, and then the ugly old birdman nearly drops him to his death until Felicia Hardy, the Black Cat, literally swoops in and makes a rescue. The story ends on yet another stunner as an employee at the hospital where Spider-Man was taken quickly snaps a photo of the webslinger sans mask – and takes it to the Daily Bugle, where an immensely pleased J. Jonah Jameson is seen to say “that’s a very familiar face.”

This part of the long arc was goosebump city from start to finish. Part of the fun of multi-part comic tales in the past was that the first part would end on a cliffhanger like a classic serial and you just had to get the next part to see how it could come out. In today’s padded storylines, more often than not they simply sequeway into each other rather than really leaving you hanging at any point. This tale was like a blast from the past, and resulted in another one of those times, where I just had to get my comics on Wednesday and not wait until the weekend or following week to pick them up (and man, was I pissed when my store forgot to pull issue #11 for me).

The #1 topic for discussion on the boards was the identity of the shadowy bad guy. Very few clues were given, except that (1) he liked to hang upside down and (2) according to Peter, over the phone he had a voice like “cut glass” (which in a comic book, admittedly is not much of a clue). Of course, speculation ran rampant, from a revived Harry Osborn, to the Chameleon (who already knew), to the HobGoblin, to the Vulture (who was soon dismissed obviously), and many more. But one favorite began to emerge – Mac Gargan – the Scorpion, although Hobby proved to be a popular fallback choice. But one thing we knew – it couldn’t be Norman Osborn – right? Because after all – he was in jail when all of this was going on!

Riiiiiggghhhttt.

It’s not surprising that so many people suspected Gargan, particularly since it generally seemed like it would be a huge letdown if the villain wasn’t a classic villain, someone from the Ditko days (and Millar’s statements that the storyline had its roots in the Lee-Ditko days added fuel to that fire) – since after all – other than the Kingpin (who the villain clearly wasn’t), Venom, who already knew, and the Shocker – most of the really good villains come from the Ditko days. I mean, yeesh – who wanted to see HydroMan as the kidnapper and mastermind? Plus, Gargan just seemed like a natural choice for an upgrade from B list to A list. His Scorpion had a very long history with Spider-Man, would appreciate the irony of Peter Parker being Spider-Man (since after all, we are first introduced to Mac Gargan waaaaaaaay back in Amazing Spider-Man #19 when he is a private detective following Peter at the behest of J. Jonah Jameson). He has the distinct disadvantage of having been misused over the years – an enormously powerful villain turned into a joke by overuse and lazy writing – but also the advantage of being a villain who could be turned into something much better if placed in the right hands. Among other notable parts of this story:

• Another villain who came off looking better than he had in awhile was our old pal Electro. All too often, there’s a tendency on writers’ part to make some of Spidey’s B-List villains laughable. Maybe it’s their funny clothes and cliched badguy behavior – but anyone who truly had Electro’s powers would be a damn frightening and dangerous dude – and that’s how he comes across here as he cooks Spidey’s goose but good. We also find out that the Vulture was a more prolific old buzzard than we thought – since in this tale he is given a son and a grandson that we never met before – not to mention that daughter that he also had in the let’s-name-a-series-virtually-identical-to-a-real-hot-project-going-on-at-DC-right-now-Identity Disc. Hey, I guess if Norman Osborn could have previously unknown kids popping out of the woodwork, so could the Vulture – not to mention a daughter for Electro, whom we meet in our look at Spider-Girl. Anyway, even though Vulch is given some altruistic motivations for his thievery in this story due to his grandson’s leukemia, he’s still a nasty bastard, as he nearly twists off the head of the nurse who is attending to the almost comatose Spider-Man.

• Speaking of our old buddy Norman, his first scenes from prison are a delight, as it seems that he does his own take on Hannibal Lechter, delighting in screwing with Peter’s mind by denying that he has anything to do with May’s kidnapping – but then with virtually the same breath implying that he just might have! Of course, we know that this was simply too obvious to have really happened and that Norman was just messing with Peter. After all, Norman wouldn’t be behind yet another scheme so soon. Right? Right? What’s ironic in looking back at this issue once the completed story is done, we realize that Norman gives the plot away exactly as it unfolded while Spider-Man is there – and the only thing he left out was the name of the villain he used!
• Here, and in the other two stories, the Black Cat puts in one of her strongest performances in a long time. No longer the total ditz she was infuriatingly portrayed as in the Mantlo-Milgrom Spectacular Spider-Man era in the 1980’s, but also not the totally reformed, altruistic private eye she was during the Clone Saga era. This Cat is one dangerous kitty. Working for the Owl, who’s making a big push to replace the toppled Kingpin, while there’s a line she won’t cross, there’s a whole lot of territory of things that she will do for a buck. And she displays a certain vicious and sadistic streak that I like – such as when she slashes the Vulture’s face – not merely to leave a calling card for her employer, but out of vengeance and spite for what he did to Peter (in fact, this Felicia is closer to the one in the What If volume II #20-21 that I discussed in Alternate Spideys. In that tale she stomped a defeated and helpless Eddie Brock in the ribs after a battle).
• The art by Rachel and Terry Dodson, with a fill-in by Frank Cho in issue #5, is terrific. It’s hard to explain because I am not an “art” guy who can articulate very well why or why not he likes certain things relative to art. Maybe I liked it partially because, even at my age, when I should definitely know better – I can still be a drooling fanboy – I’m partial to big-boobed women and their bubble butts.
• Other less, ahem, messy fanboy orgasms included a scene of Peter’s old room with various momentos from the past, including the infamous microscope given to him by Uncle Ben in Amazing Fantasy #15 (yes, I know there have been contradictory stories about this little trinket’s fate), the busted glasses from Amazing Spider-Man #8, a Living Brain toy from the same issue, an authentic Coffee Bean poster from the 1960’s era, and yes, the Spider-Mobile.

But as much as there was to rave about this part of the story, there were a lot of nagging issues that just didn’t seem right. For example:

• Most of the epic battle with the Green Goblin happened before the story even started! And since The Pulse #5 ended with Norman’s first capture – that means that perhaps the second most important battle between Spidey and the Green Goblin (the first obviously being the death of Gwen and Norman’s subsequent impalement), the fight that finally brings Norman Osborn down, the fight that lasted for four hours per Spidey’s recollection – is one that we’ll never see! Shit, shit, shit! That, ladies and gentlemen, is the definition of a cheat.
• Spidey’s barging in on the Avengers like he does in issue #2 seems to stretch the bounds of believability that he would have to go to such lengths to get an audience (I don’t recall there being a mention of why he didn’t go to the Fantastic Four. He also didn’t check in on Daredevil because Millar didn’t know that DD already knew his secret identity – although this was later covered by Murdock being “out of town”). After all, the Avengers would surely have a means of confirming his identity even though he no longer had a membership card (and in one of those “oops” moments where one writer doesn’t know what another is doing, in She-Hulk #4 in the same year there was such a device used to prove that the “real” Spider-Man was taking the stand). While it is characteristic for Spidey to feel insecure being around a group of superheroes that is more universally accepted and liked by the public than himself, all of these people should know each other well enough by now and have covered each other’s ass so many times that the degree of incivility present shouldn’t occur, which is not saying they should be bosom buds, because they aren’t and really shouldn’t be. Now, I suppose that it is possible that Jarvis, who was mocking Spidey and refusing to let him into the mansion, really didn’t believe it was a prankster, and was simply just messing with Spidey to be messing with him. We know from Spider-Man Annual #16 that Jarvis didn’t care for Spider-Man, and frankly, the wall crawler does have a habit of busting into Avengers mansion without an invite when it suits him – such as Avengers #236 when he wanted to become a member, and after the reboot when he came looking for some Avengers during that idiotic “Eighth Day” crossover event and wrecked the team’s security system yet again. The prim and proper Jarvis may just consider him to be the most uncouth and uncivilized of superheroes. Taken a degree further, this might even explain what appeared to be some uncharacteristic harshness on Peter’s part in dealing with Jarvis in Marvel Knights Spider-Man #13, when he saw the butler in his apartment having tea with Aunt May. He may well have still been pissed off – particularly since it was Aunt May herself that he was desperately seeking help trying to find and Jarvis was being an obstacle in that search.
• Also in issue #2, when Spidey went to the Owl, of all friggin’ people, for help, he did virtually everything but tell him his real name! Surely the Owl would be smart enough and curious enough to wonder why this one old woman meant so much to Spider-Man. But even that aside, under no circumstances can I see him turning to a petty criminal such as the Owl for assistance in a matter like this. In fact in issue #5, he rags on Felicia for working for the Owl, when not long before he went to the crimelord hat in hand looking for help!
• Electro now likes gay sex. Oh, it’s not said, but it’s certainly implied, with Max Dillon wanting to try something new as he discovered a “different side of himself” in prison. Maybe I’m just an old fuddy duddy, but crap like that gets in the way of the story because rather than being a legitimate plot point or facet of the character, it just seems like a titillating obsession of the writer (I will say this – at least it’s not a political screed like it is for other writers). At least old Sparky’s back to hitting for the other team in the subsequent New Avengers first story arc.
• At the end of issue #4, City Editor Joe Robertson seems way too eager to give Jonah the pictures of Spider-Man in the hospital without his mask. Most of us have long assumed that Robbie knows that Peter is Spider-Man (although Millar states the he believes the only people who should know Spidey’s i.d. are MJ, the Cat, Osborn, and Venom – and he’s got a point), and while his integrity and dedication to his profession probably couldn’t allow him to bury the pictures (and as we later found out – Spidey appears too bloodied and battered to be identified anyway), he still seems all too happy to feed Jonah’s obsession with the web-slinger.
• Yet another “Does Jonah Know?” cliffhanger as at the end of issue #4, Jonah states “that’s a very familiar face” upon seeing the pictures. This wasn’t really a cliffhanger, but another flat-out cheat – as the aforementioned comment indicates. Plus, this is the 4th time I can think that this has been done – either let him finally find out – or just STOP IT!

But I liked it, I really did. And I couldn’t wait for the next arc to begin.

Venomous

Just repeat to yourself…this cover is not sexually suggestive. This cover is not sexually suggestive. The artist does not have “issues.” The artist does not have “issues.”

Didn’t work for me, either.

But getting back to the task at hand – issue #5 opens with a dying Eddie Brock (we learned he had terminal cancer in Paul Jenkins’Spectacular Spider-Man #1-5 in 2003) arriving in town at the behest of an unidentified sponsor, for an unidentified purpose. There are no references to the short-lived Venom series that ultimately spawned (no pun intended) the latest symbiote superhero in Toxin. This was just fine with me because I avoided that series like the plague, regardless of how many times Spidey appeared in it.

Peter Parker awakens from a 2 1/2 day slumber while his badly damaged body healed itself, all the time under the close care of his wife, Mary Jane, and the aforementioned Felicia Hardy (hmm, how many of us would go a few rounds with Electro if we knew that we would have a couple of nurses like that looking after us?). He should have stayed in bed, as the Daily Bugle is offering a $5 million reward to anyone who can identify the disfigured face under Spider-Man’s mask (although unmasked, he was apparently too battered and bloodied to make a positive ID – although I find myself wondering what a forensic artist or computer specialist would have been able to do with that picture given a chance). While looking for photo ops that he can hustle to old J. Jonah Jameson (MJ’s been a bit careless with the checkbook again), he runs into a half-naked, deranged and drooling Doctor Octopus terrorizing the city (I know that they are rare, but there are some “Shirtless Ock” groupies out there that probably got the biggest charge out of this). Doctor Drool goes down easier than usual this time, as Spidey finds out that he has been drilled with a half dozen tranquilizer darts in the process of escaping from a police convoy that was transporting him from prison to a medical facility for some “tests.”

Hmmm.

However, Peter isn’t getting any closer to finding Aunt May, and the mysterious kidnapper hasn’t called again. So, to find out how a psychopath thinks, rather than go see an experienced shrink like his old pal and John Jameson’s squeeze Dr. Ashley Kafka, Spider-Man inexplicably pays yet another visit to the No.1 psycho on his hit parade – Norman Osborn (again, Spidey goes to a crook for help instead of someone from the right side of the tracks. Bad judgment on Spidey’s part or was it the writing?) However, “Silence of the Lambs” was clearly not on Norman’s “must see” movie list, as he has no intention of being Anthony Hopkins to Peter’s Jodie Foster. He then proceeds to tell Spidey a horrid little story about what happened to the last person who asked for Norman’s help, which moves him up another notch on the all-time Sick Bastard list. But Norman also tells Spider-Man that his very life is in danger, and that it is tied to recent burglaries at Osborn’s company as well as the events surrounding Doc Ock.

Big things are also happening with Spidey’s other “A-List” villain – the Vicious Villain Venom. At the Ditko Theater (neat, eh?), a huge congregation of B to Z-List Marvel supervillains is gathering to bid on a very special “costume,” the alien symbiote that comprises one half of Venom. The auctioneer, the Terrible Tinkerer, introduces Eddie Brock, who after seeing “Passion of the Christ,” and being your typical guilt-plagued Catholic, has decided to seek penance. He will auction the symbiote to the highest bidder, give all of the proceeds to charity, and then wait out the rest of his days until the cancer takes its final toll. The winner of the auction is crime boss Don Fortunato, who paid $100 million so that the symbiote could make something of his nerdy, weasel of a son, Angelo.

In the meantime, Spidey takes yet another couple of kicks to the gut. First, JJJ’s $5 million bounty on his secret identity is bringing all of the nut job supervillains out of the woodwork, as well as lesser lunatics who think that by putting on a Spider-Man costume they can convince JJJ to part with the money, except that some of these dopes are getting themselves killed. And then, in one of those soap opera cliché moments of coincidence, Spider-Man has a chance meeting with the mother of the Vulture’s sick grandson, who laments the fact that old Vulch promised to come up with the cash to meet the kid’s medical needs – but then disappeared.

Oops. Punch Pete’s ticket for another Parker guilt trip.

Later, Liz Osborn cons Peter and Mary Jane into attending his 10-year high school class reunion (anyone remember when Peter went to his 5-year reunion back in the pages of Spider-Man Annual #17?), where Pete does get a little joy out of parading his supermodel wife around for all of his former tormentors to see. His moment of self-indulgence is ruined by the appearance of the Angelo Fortunato Venom, clearly enjoying his power and determined to make a name for himself by killing Spider-Man. But although Angelo has the power, he doesn’t have the experience or the intestinal fortitude to withstand Spider-Man’s relentless assault, and his confidence fades. He flees from Spider-Man, but the symbiote, disgusted with Angelo’s weakness, abruptly abandons him in mid leap from skyscraper to skyscraper, leaving the young Fortunato to fall to a rather messy death on the pavement below. And Eddie Brock? Unfortunately, $100 million for 50 charities still wasn’t enough to purge Brock of his torture and guilt – and he slits his wrists in a suicide attempt and “doesn’t look like he’ll make it through the night.”

Peter decides to end Jameson’s competition, and brings in photos that appear to prove to Jonah that his son John, who briefly dropped by earlier in the story, is Spider-Man. Inexplicably, Jonah actually believes him – and gives Peter a share of the $5 million (of course, Jonah rationalizes not giving him any more because he can never print the pictures – he’s not going to out his own son). Feeling guilty for having accepted $500,000 on false pretenses, Peter finds a perfect way of disposing of the money – by leaving it with the mother of the Vulture’s grandson, saying it was from the old bird himself.

Finally, the kidnapper comes calling again, this time offering to meet Peter and explain the whole thing. No cell phone reception problems with this call, as we happen to see the kidnapper making it while sticking to the antennae on top of the Empire State Building.

The anticipation builds…

Is Eddie Really Dead?
According to Millar on his message board (you have to virtually go through the whole thread to read his answers), when he originally wrote the story, Eddie was dead beyond a reasonable doubt. However, Marvel asked him to leave some ambiguity, which I actually find myself agreeing with. Personally, I do think that Eddie Brock is used up as a character. I don’t think he ever really recovered from his “Lethal Protector” phase in the 1990’s, when Marvel ruined him to cash in on his popularity. The original Brock was a psychotic killer, but one that was still influenced by the morality of his Catholic faith and had traces of humanity and compassion. This complexity was trashed by turning him into an Image-style violent vigilante, where it became o.k. to kill because everyone else he encountered was worse than he was. After this phase of his existence burned itself out, subsequent writers tried to move him back to what he was, but this ultimately resulted in a muddled character with way too much baggage. But even though I think that Brock should really have died at the end of Jenkins’ story arc in Spectacular, I actually see this as a glimmer of hope that Marvel is going to have a little more sense about killing off villains and supporting characters. It’s too easy to do, and inevitably one of two things happens (1) some other writer comes up with an idea to resurrect the character, which even if it isn’t a completely goofy one, still negates whatever impact the “death” story had or (2) the series actually suffers near irreparable harm because the character leaves a hole that is never completely re-filled. An example of (1) would be the death of Doctor Octopus during the Clone Saga – which was such a stupid idea – killing off one of Spider-Man’s few A-list villains – that I had no objection to a completely lame mystic ninja ritual bringing him back. An example of (2) would be the death of Harry Osborn, which I don’t want to delve into too deeply because – well – I have plans for Harry – but even though his death made Norman’s return possible – I’m not sure that killing Harry hasn’t actually done more harm than good. So, just leave Eddie in story limbo. No need to revive him if no one finds a sufficient reason to tell a good story. But if someone does have such a story – then why not go for it?

Obviously, the handling of Brock and the symbiote in this story ran afoul of how Jenkins wrapped up his Venom story, with the two permanently joined. Brock could not survive without the symbiote, while the latter stated that it was capable of only one more joining, and did not want to rejoin Brock because it did not want to share his cancer. In this case, going with the Marvel Knights rather than the Spectacular story seems to be in the best long-term interests of the character.

Things I liked about “Venomous” included:

• It was great to see Spider-Man start kicking the new Venom’s ass after thinking “time to show this punk who he’s dealing with.” After all, this is Spider-Man we’re talking about, one of the most intelligent, resourceful, and determined heroes in the Marvel Universe. Far too often he gets the crap beat out of him by nobodies or goes down too easily in a fight. It was nice to see him portrayed as the experienced and skilled warrior that he truly is.
• You know, sometimes I just love to see a scumbag meet a nice, gruesome death – and watching Angelo Fortunato’s guts explode from his dead carcass like rotten fruit warmed my redneck law and order heart. I’m really not sure if there’s much point in comparing the Fortunato Venom with Brock, simply because Angelo clearly wasn’t meant to survive outside this storyline. While there might have been some interesting stories to tell with a young, immature Venom who has used his childhood angst to justify murder and mayhem, I don’t think that such a character could have given Venom the jump-start he needed to get back to A-List villain status.

• Who says there’s no romantic tension in a marriage? I’m sure you all noticed how Mary Jane less than subtly inserted herself between Peter and Felicia in issue #5, and the latter’s reaction. Betty and Veronica are back! And you could see MJ’s fear that Peter might feel that he has more in common with the Cat than with her. But then I forget myself and the Marvel Mantra that states that there can be no romantic tension with a married couple. The same mantra that insists that it is unrealistic and makes Peter an unrelatable character when he has a supermodel wife to go home to, but persists in believing that it is totally realistic and relatable that he always has at least two good looking women, including a big boobed platinum blond, pining for his ass, or some other part of his anatomy. I can understand readers who don’t care for Spider-Man as a married character – it’s simply their preference. But all too often the silly aforementioned cliches’ are dragged out of the closet by anti-marriage writers and others who don’t seem to realize that the arguments they fall back upon make no sense whatsoever.
• Millar gives us another great Norman Osborn moment in issue #6 as he relays his story of the prison guard with the sick wife who wanted Norman’s help in finding out what was wrong with her. Of course, Norman being the kind soul that he was, prescribed the kind of treatment guaranteed to put her in the ground a hell of a lot quicker. After watching Norman completely lose his grip in The Pulse and acting like a garden variety raving loony at times, it was nice to see the return of the cool, calm, and collected psychopath. Getting arrested was probably one of the best things to happen to Norman because it triggered various schemes to focus that powerfully deranged intellect upon. Still, even though we get a nice chill running down our collective spine as Osborn tells his story, it still seems incredulous that Peter would be so naïve, no, so stupid that he would actually believe that Osborn would help him. He has to be the only one who thinks that there is any humanity left in Norman Osborn.

• MJ is packing. And she’s got a gun, too. I love girls with guns. And I love seeing MJ assert herself like this. The hell with being a victim – some sonofabitch gets too close – it’s Swiss cheese time!
• The reference to “poor old Ben Reilly.” This guy was like a brother to Peter – I can’t believe Marvel expects everyone to just forget him because they f****d up by temporarily making Reilly the “real” Spider-Man. Good job, Millar. It’s also funny that Mary Jane suggests that Harry Osborn has come back from the dead because after all – Norman did!
• The masher coming on to Mary Jane at the high school reunion, claiming to be Spider-Man (while using the classic next to last line from the first Spider-Man film), and MJ’s response that she’s already married to the Hulk, who won’t appreciate someone hitting on her. Of course, at that time Spidey and Venom come crashing through the wall, with the masher saying “now I just feel stupid.” That was worth a laugh.

And then there’s the dings:

• Does Jonah really believe his son is Spider-Man? Surely not. That boat does not float. It’s not just the fact that the two have been seen together, but when John was the Man-Wolf – what – he hired someone else to be Spider-Man for him? Someone with all of Spider-Man’s powers? Someone with Spider-Man’s obnoxious personality? I can think of at least three instances right off the top of my head, such as Amazing #125, Spectacular Spider-Man Annual #3 and Amazing #190, instances that Jonah should have been able to recall himself, that would have proven Peter to be the liar that he was. Plus, Pete’s faked photos before – remember when he sold Jonah pics that seemed to show that Electro and Spider-Man were one and the same? Or the time he was caught by scumbag reporter Nick Katezenberg wearing a Spider-Man costume – and only got out of that jam by claiming that he had faked other Spider-Man photos? Or the time that Harry Osborn (unknown to Jonah or Peter) sent JJJ pictures of Peter disposing of his clone – which led Jameson to believe that Spider-Man had actually killed Peter and taken his place? And considering how many times that JJJ has been in the presence of Spider-Man, he didn’t notice a difference between Spider-Man’s scrawny build (particularly in the very old days when Spidey was still a teenager) and John’s athletic one? This goes beyond making Jonah just obstinate and pig-headed – it makes him stupid – which he isn’t by any stretch of the imagination. Fortunately, Peter David in Friendly Nieghborhood Spider-Man has taken care of that problem.
• As we later learned, Rachel Summer’s vision of May’s kidnapper, as someone who “is different than he used to be. He’s not human anymore.” was yet another cheat, a false clue to try to divert us from guessing who it was. After all, when we see the kidnapper in issue #9, he’s still very much human.
• Weird glitch of the month – in issue #7, Spidey says in referencing his life in tights “this is how I’ve spent my nights since I was 18 years old.” No one caught this before publication? It’s been long established that Peter was either 15 or 16 (Gerry Conway said 15 in the trade Parallel Lives) when he was bitten by the radioactive spider.

So, in conclusion, although it had more plot than its predecessor did, “Venomous” was a weaker story than “Down Among the Dead Men,” and slowed the overall storyline down. Still, it was pretty good, and was probably the most interesting use of the Venom character in recent memory. And, at least the stage was been set for an exciting conclusion.

The Last Stand
And this is what it all comes down to, after all of the months of speculating and second-guessing. It was interesting that Millar decided to play all of his cards in the first issue of this story arc, #9, rather than keeping everyone guessing until the very end, but it works for me as this allows a better and more gradual build to the climax. Peter finally meets May’s kidnapper and discovers that it is none other than Mac Gargan – the Scorpion, who was probably the odds-on fan favorite by this time (my personal choice was Alistair Smythe because I thought the kidnapper and mastermind were one and the same and Smythe has the scientific know-how to pull off some of the techno wizardry – plus he has undergone some mutations in the past himself and could conceivably be “no longer human”). But then there was the bigger surprise – Gargan was acting on the orders of someone else – Norman Osborn – and a collective groan was heard ’round Spideyland as it is revealed that Norman is behind yet another master plan to screw with Spidey. I remember thinking that it couldn’t be Norman, it wouldn’t be Norman, that would be too obvious and repetitive to have Osborn behind this plot as well. But, as it turned out, Osborn’s cryptic comments to Spider-Man in issue #2 really did give the plot away.

But this revelation comes with an additional twist as Gargan gives Peter the previously untold history of the Marvel Universe – that many of the original super villains that came into existence were actually created at the behest of a secret cabal of powerful business interests, who wanted them to serve as a counterweight to the rise of the superhero. Norman Osborn was in the middle of it – with his connections, money, and scientific acumen – creating several of these villains – until he went nuts and became one himself. And now with Norman arrested, his old cronies consider him a loose cannon that could potentially expose them all (remember back during the first HobGoblin saga in the 1980’s when Hobby ran across a cache of Norman’s files and used them to blackmail several of his old associates? The guy is nothing if not a fastidious record keeper), so now their contingency plan goes into effect – Doctor Octopus is being programmed to murder him to keep him from exposing any of them.

So what do Gargan and Norman want? Spider-Man must break Osborn out of prison – or else May dies. Simple as that. But as Peter and Gargan return to their respective residences – Gargan discovers that he has a visitor waiting for him – a certain alien symbiote that’s looking for a new host.

With the Black Cat’s assistance, Spider-Man succeeds in freeing Osborn – but once again he misjudges his greatest enemy – assuming that Norman would actually keep his end of the bargain and free Aunt May. Instead, Norman has hired 11 of Spidey’s rogues gallery to keep him busy and ultimately kill him (he collectively calls their association “The Sinister Twelve”) – while Osborn himself goes to kill Mary Jane. However, the Scorpion shows up to the party late – and no wonder. Mac Gargan is now the keeper of the Venom symbiote – and he couldn’t be happier (of course, Norman is pissed off because this was not part of his plan).

As Osborn seeks out MJ, Spidey and the Cat are doing their best against the remaining 11, but they really don’t have a prayer. Peter decides that if he’s going to die, then he’s going to take as many of them down with him as possible. But at the last minute (trumpet please!) the cavalry arrives in the form of Captain America, Iron Man, Giant Man, the Fantastic Four, and Daredevil. Turns out that Mary Jane figured that Osborn was going to screw Peter (figuratively) and called SHIELD, which sent out the troops.

The combined might of the varied superheroes defeats 10 of the Sinister 12, but Venom is able to slip away as Peter heads for home, the former attempting to delay Spider-Man to allow Osborn to take Mary Jane. It works – MJ is gone when he gets there, and Spider-Man heads to the place he just knows that Osborn is going to go – the bridge (well, not the same bridge, a new bridge just for her according to Osborn – which come to think about it – looks like the Queensboro Bridge from the first Spidey film – that’s a neat little tie-in) – and we see Norman’s ugly Goblin mug in one of the best renderings ever of the Green Goblin. Spidey finds out that Norman has kept Aunt May anesthetized all of this time – but she will run out of air in 45 minutes – and Peter will never find her in time!

MJ finally gets to pull out her gun and shoot Norman, but the ricochet sends her off the bridge, and Peter gets to practice that move he’s been going over in his head ever since Gwen died. Sending out multiple lines of webbing rather than a single strand, he is able to save MJ’s life.

Suddenly, Doc Ock appears crawling up the bridge looking for Osborn! But this is yet another cheat. The Ock who escaped in the previous issue seemed to be of a clear, though hypnotized mind “oh – this will not do – this requires a plan with serious legs,” but the Ock that caught up with Osborn is virtually a mindless zombie “Must kill Norman Osborn.” Bleh. The first ever meeting between the Green Goblin and Doc Ock is this? They don’t even get in any good licks on each other because a bolt of lightning comes from nowhere, separating the two, and sending them plunging into the murky waters below. Talk about an easy way out of a story.

Suddenly Peter remembers that there was new turf over Uncle Ben’s grave. Why replace the turf when just the headstone was vandalized? That, combined with a cryptic comment from Osborn about May “not being down among the dead men yet” leads him back to the cemetery, where after furious digging, he discovers Aunt May alive and well – rescuing her just in the nick of time.

But this isn’t the end. Doc Ock is discovered alive and well and floating in the river – but Osborn is nowhere to be found. Peter receives a letter from Osborn, congratulating him on his victory, and ensuring him that he has earned a respite whether or not Norman survived the final battle. And then the letter gets really weird, with Osborn expressing nothing but affection and good will towards Peter and his family – all of the smarminess you would expect from the mind of a madman who continues to play his devious little games.

O.K. – I had a couple of questions:

What About the Businessmens’ Secret Cabal?
Well – that was interesting. A secret cabal of businessmen who wanted to keep the superheroes busy so that they wouldn’t turn their attention to politics and social injustice, created the original villains in the Marvel Universe? I’m not sure this is a particularly original idea, or even one that is congruous with the origins of the Marvel Universe as related in other titles. Probably some knowledgeable fans could tell me if a theory similar to this has been posed elsewhere. But after all, what better way to ensure that superhumans don’t start running for political office or investigating white collar corruption but by giving them super bad guys to fight to keep them off balance? It also provides a more logical sequeway for Norman Osborn to assume the identity of the Green Goblin. It’s the one reason that I actually liked John Byrne’s story in Chapter One that showed that Osborn once owned a small movie studio that made science fiction films. When you’re already evil, rich and powerful, what would possess you to don a garish costume and fly around on a big metal toy? Well, if you’re already in the position of creating colorful supervillains, maybe there comes a point in time where you say “I can do this better!”

I must confess, I also like this because as a result, Norman Osborn is not only a key player in Spider-Man’s world, but he’s also a key player in the Marvel Universe – period. Maybe, just maybe, this is the chance to have Norman show up and bedevil some other superheroes (like Iron Man, for example – since he and Tony Stark can’t stand each other) and give his enmity with Spider-Man a much needed and well-deserved rest.

And oh yeah, the superheroes actually began showing up in the Marvel Universe in 1939, not 1945.

Why did Norman Choose Mac Gargan?
It’s hard to believe Norman Osborn letting anyone in on any of his secrets. He once stated in Revenge of the Green Goblin that Peter Parker’s little secret was going to stay to himself. And to reveal Peter’s secret to someone also meant revealing his own. But why would Norman chose Gargan – since there’s no indication of there ever being a relationship between the two? Why not his “cousin” (f we are to believe John Byrne’s Chapter One) Sandman? Or the Vulture – since in Tangled Web #13, Osborn visits the Bar With no Name at the Vulture’s invitation. The fact that Osborn is good-natured enough to take some flack from the Vulture in that story, but gives Kraven Jr. the “Stare of Evil,” in a similar situation, implies a certain amount of existing respect. The Vulture also knows Peter Parker, since Parker attacked him once when the old bird was seeking May’s forgiveness for the death of her boyfriend, Nathan Lubensky, during the time he was dying of cancer. Toomes also had some scientific know how – and due to the electromagnetic impulses from his flying apparatus, is a lot stronger than men half his age. Or what about choosing someone else who also knew the secret – such as the Chameleon did at one time? I figure that Osborn would only choose someone who had been at the supervillain game nearly as long as he, and who also knew of Peter Parker because then they could appreciate the irony of the knowledge (such as Parker working for the Bugle and JJJ).

Well, for one, to use the Chameleon would have been a huge letdown, because it seemed that the story was being set in motion by someone who only recently found out. Osborn would not have used Doc Ock, because I do not see any conceivable way those two with their massive intellects and similarly massive egos and their mutual long history with Spider-Man could ever cooperate. Sandman, although perhaps Osborn’s cousin – was a just a thug. Lizard? See below. Electro? Another thug. The original Mysterio was dead – and I don’t see Osborn using his replacement. Kraven is dead. The Enforcers are just thugs for hire. Alistair Smythe? Similar in a way to Doc Ock, Norman would never work anyone who might think he was as smart as Osborn, or smarter.

So that pretty well just leaves us the Vulture and Scorpion, and my speculation is that Osborn trusted Gargan because he had dealt with him before. Remember, let’s go back to Amazing Spider-Man #19, when Gargan is spying on Peter Parker for J. Jonah Jameson. How do you suppose that Jonah chose Gargan for his dirty work? Could it be that Jonah hired Gargan based on a reference from another member of Jonah’s social circle or country club? And could that member who had employed Gargan be – Norman Osborn? Perhaps Norman had used Gargan before in his capacity as a private detective – and Gargan proved himself adept and trustworthy in some particularly dirty assignments that Osborn had given him. So, when Norman needed someone in the supervillain community to help him in the next stage of his war against Spider-Man, he picked the one villain he had dealings with before – and one he felt he could count on not to betray him.

But what’s also interesting is that Norman gave this information to Gargan at least one year before the events of MK Spidey. Why that time? Because as I suspected when I wrote about Death in the Family, Norman must have sensed that he was going to lose his grip again, that his insanity was bound to get the best of him, which is why he wanted Peter to kill him in that story. He must have foreseen something like the events of The Pulse occurring, that he would reach a point where the carelessness accentuated by his insanity would result in his undoing. And he would have to have a plan to get his ass out of prison.

And it also makes sense that he would use Spider-Man to bust him out of prison, as opposed to any number of scumbags he could pay. With Spider-Man’s stealth, agility, ability to crawl on walls and ceilings, and spider-sense alerting him to danger, including alarms and various traps, he’s the perfect candidate to lead a jailbreak.

And this even falls in line with “Sins Past” to some degree. Norman always has plans backing up plans. Therefore, with Norman incapacitated in some fashion at the end of this story, Sarah and Gabriel Stacy were his back up in the event the scheme from Marvel Knights Spider-Man failed.

A New Venom?

And it’s about time. For Venom to continue to be an effective villain, there had to be a new player behind the symbiote – someone with motivations a hell of a lot sturdier and able to stand the test of time than Eddie Brock’s (I’ve discussed this in other articles – I won’t repeat it here) – someone who could return the character to A-List status without all of Brock’s baggage. Frankly, I’ve always thought it was a cheat back in Amazing #300 for Venom to be someone we had never even seen or met before. Mac Gargan is a classic Ditko villain who himself was in need of a boost, whose potential was being squandered by poor writing that was turning him into a joke, and who could conceivably have such an existing mad-on for Spider-Man that would more than compliment the symbiote’s own hatred and solidify their bond. The new Venom being Gargan solves some problems as well – since the symbiote knew Spidey’s identity and Gargan did as well. By making Gargan Venom, this keeps the number of enemies who know Spidey’s identity confined to himself and Osborn, which is how it should be. I’m assuming if the Chameleon DID survive the Webspinners story arc, his brain has blown a few gears to the point he’s forgotten Spidey’s identity (he was a giggly madman in Ron Zimmerman’s sad sack of a story “Call me Al” so maybe he’s got amnesia) and unfortunately, I just choose to ignore Paul Jenkins’ “The Lizard’s Tale,” where both Connors and the Lizard know his i.d. Again, I’ll assume that Connors’ referenced ingestion of chemicals in prison in issue #7 also fried his brain so that he’s forgotten the secret as well.

I can see why Gargan won’t reveal Peter’s i.d., either, even after being arrested. After all, knowing who Spider-Man is and also being the new Venom moves him from B-List to A-List, and even puts him in Osborn’s class of being one of Spidey’s deadliest foes. Why should he share that information with anyone else? Just like Doc Ock wasn’t going to reveal Peter’s identity during that brief period of time during the Clone Saga when he knew whom Spider-Man was (before he died). After all of these years, the battles are simply too personal for them to share this delicious information with anyone else.

More of the good:

• There’s a wonderful scene with Peter and Uncle Ben in issue #9, where Peter confides in Ben his fear that because Ben and May are so much older than the parents of his contemporaries, that he’s going to lose them much sooner. It’s a sweet moment with Uncle Ben being the squirrelly old coot we’ve grown to love – “do I look like the kind of guy that’s gonna let his little brother down?” and “buddies don’t have secrets” are a couple of neat lines that I can recall off the top of my head. It’s easy to see why Peter so desperately misses this man. Sure, by being Spider-Man, he has avenged Ben’s death over and over and over – he has nothing really left to prove – but dammit – he still needs him – needs his wisdom, his compassion, his life experiences, his ability to see the forest and not just the trees. Of course, Peter loves and trusts Aunt May and Mary Jane, but nothing – nothing – truly fills the hole left behind when you lose your father, or your father figure. It just seems like your moral center has been ripped away from you, never to be repaired.Trust me on this one. I know.
• The portrayal of Norman Osborn is pretty dead on throughout the entire storyline. Norman shows one of the things that distinguishes him from other supervillains – he has no sense of honor or fair play. Even Doctor Octopus, a completely deranged egomaniac who on more than one occasion was willing to cause massive death and destruction for his own selfish reasons, every once in a while displays a sense of decency that probably existed in the man before he became a monster. The old Eddie Brock Venom had a moral code – a peculiar one that was subject to re-interpretation every now and then, but it did exist. But Norman Osborn was, is, and will always be, an irredeemably evil scumbag, and the explosion that gave him the strength of the Green Goblin did nothing but give his already existing insanity an outlet. As Spider-Man once told Harry Osborn in Web of Spider-Man #67, “there was nothing good about Norman Osborn.” Here, Norman is brilliant and cunning, messing with Peter and just completely out of his f*****g mind. Unlike Otto Octavious and Eddie Brock, who every once in a while longed to be something else – this is who Norman Osborn is, and who he really wants to be.
• Venom’s reference to Osborn going after Mary Jane “because he’s wanted a crack at her for some time.” O.K. – I know that has a double meaning these days in the post “Sins Past” era – but it underscores the fact that Osborn also hates MJ all on her own. She rejected his son – and in his opinion probably fueled Harry’s drug dependency.
• Frankly, I liked some of Spidey’s old pals and acquaintances coming to the rescue. I mean, how many times has he helped them out? It wasn’t that long ago that he assisted Daredevil, for example, in taking on the Yakuza during the “Kingpin of Hell’s Kitchen” storyline. Yeah, in a way, it’s kind of a dramatic cheat for a handful of superheroes to be standing by in case you’re getting your ass kicked – but other than Spidey turning tail and running – it would have been even more absurd for him to be able to defeat all of the villains attacking him at the same time anyway.
• Norman’s letter at the end is perfectly demented and perfectly logical. It explains a lot about his motives as well. One doesn’t wake up and say “Today I will be a supervillain and go out in public wearing very tacky and unflattering clothing.” He was sick, but he was also bored. Unfortunately, boredom is the foundation for many crimes, particularly those committed by young people. In a very strange way, Norman himself has actually found a sort of peace as a result of the events of The Pulse and Marvel Knights. He knows what he is and he likes what he is. No more pretending to be the upstanding businessman – that was more of a costume than the green one with the pointy purple hat. And I don’t think he’s lying when he confesses to a great deal of affection for Peter Parker – I think he really means it. It’s rather quite similar to when Doc Ock feverishly tried to save Peter’s life when the Vulture had stricken him with a virus during the Clone Saga. Ock’s life had become so defined by his enmity with Peter Parker that Spider-Man’s death by means other than Ock’s own hands seemed a rather empty proposition. In many ways, Peter is indeed the son he always wanted, and unable to have that kind of relationship, he finds him a truly worthy opponent. As Osborn once alluded to Peter in a flashback issue that took place years before they starting donning the spandex – they were destined to become great friends – or mortal enemies.

And then there’s the bad:

• Norman, Norman, Norman, why is it always Norman? Ever since he came back at the end of the Clone Saga, there has been a tendency to overuse him and give him all of the good plots because he’s everything that an archenemy needs to be. I mean, look at the Joker and Lex Luthor, and how often they continue to show up to bedevil Batman and Superman. They’re simply too good to leave alone and everyone likes to use them – oftentimes to their detriment, or when other villains would work just as well. After all, didn’t Doc Ock used to be “The Master Planner” – capable of hatching evil, complicated schemes? And wasn’t the Chameleon the leg man that carried out Harry Osborn’s posthumous robot parents plan? I like Norman, and frankly, I think his use in this story makes it better than it would have been using any other villain – but I share the general concern that he is being overused.
• Norman taking Mary Jane to a bridge. I know this is something that Norman would likely do, to taunt Peter, but considering we had just seen THE bridge in “Sins Past,” I’m tired of bridges.
• While it gets the Spidey fanboy’s drool-o-meter going full steam to see such a conglomeration of his most famous villains in one spot, some of the attendees didn’t make sense. Chameleon? O.K. – let’s get around the fact that for all intents and purposes, no one came up with a convincing resurrection story after he took a plunge off a bridge in Webspinners #11 (and ignoring that abomination that was the “Get Kraven” miniseries, which also had the Vulture and Kraven Jr. as an Abbott and Costello vigilante team, while Spidey just stands by like an amused parent watching his “kids” on the playground). But just what the heck was he going to do while surrounded by all of these other powerhouses? Go get the donuts and coffee for the other guys while they were beating up Spidey? And the Lizard? If Curt Connors were controlling the Lizard, then why would he kill Spider-Man? And if he isn’t controlling the Lizard, as is suggested by a brief encounter in issue #7, then the other villains have got to be even crazier to want him around. He’s just as likely to attack them as he is Spider-Man!
• Doc Ock deserved much, much better than he got in this tale, where he was treated as a lame C-List villain who only drooled in issue #5 and threw a few girlie slaps at the Green Goblin in issue #12 because he was under some form of mind control. He really shouldn’t have been used at all because 2003 and 2004 were years of Doc Ock Overload due to the second motion picture. The excitement and carnage (no pun intended) that a long overdue Goblin/Ock confrontation generated was wasted on this anti-climactic event. A true Green Goblin/Doc Ock battle royal is still waiting to be written.
• A lightning strike saves the day? Aw geez. Millar has stated that it was to be implied that Uncle Ben was watching out for Peter and May – but still seems like a “random” act of God (or Ben) and is a cheap and lousy way to end a 12 part story.

Conclusion
“Old school Spidey fan” from the Hero Realm Boards said it perhaps the best – “the story was not perfect, but it was perfectly enjoyable.” While it had way too many plot holes to simply gloss over – it was still one of the most exciting Spider-Man stories in a very long time. While I was initially sad that Millar left after issued #12, it’s pretty obvious that he used up all of the good tricks and really has nothing else to say about Spider-Man at the moment.

At least until 2006’s “Civil War,” I suppose.