“Okay, I’m just gonna head home now. Because I don’t think you need me for this one.”

Well, yeah. That happened. Don’t really know what to say about it. Like seriously. Wow. 

Writer: Mike Costa

Art: David Baldeon

Inkers: Walden Wong & Rick Magyar

Colorist: Matt Yackey

Letterer: VC’s Joe Caramagna

Editor: Axel Alonso

Plot: In Earth-138, Hobart Brown and his band of Spider-Slayers are going full punk rock when they are interrupted by Adrian Toomes, a ‘vulture’ who plans to silence the Slayers by making them…pay him (?). Just as all out war is about to break out, Toomes is taken out by Spider-Ham 2099 (Yes, he is a thing, google it). We then visit Earth-982, where Anya is doing maths homework with the aid of Uncle Ben, avoiding the liveliness of the Warriors. Cue cut to Earth-001, where the still-stranded Lady Spider is annoyed with Ham for eating her Curried Chicken, The argument escalates, only to be interrupted by a visit from Hobart and Spider-Ham 2099. Mayday returns to Earth-001, where Hobart tells the team of the invasion currently happening on his earth – an invasion he believes to be heralded by Ham 2099. The Warriors make the trip to Earth-138 where they are attacked by… DUCKBOTS! (No, I’m being serious). Of course, these fearsome foes are led by the malevelont Ducktor Doom 2099. Yup. That’s a thing now. The team get their butts handed to them by the Duckbots until Ham uses his mighty cartoon powers to vanquish their foes. But the conflict is not over, because Ham is then squashed by… a giant Spider-Robot fighting a giant Green Goblin robot. Wow. 

Spider-Thoughts: Well, that happened. It was the most insane, random story I’ve read this side of Howard the Duck. It featured a bizarre team-up, even crazier villains and a cliffhanger that left me with a giant grin on my face. So kudos, Mike Costa; you made the insane insanely good.

So why does this work? On paper, this issue should be a convoluted mess. But when Costa and Baldeon deliver it to us, it never loses the feel of the rest of the series. Despite having robot ducks as the main antagonist of the story, it feels just as natural as last issue when they were throwing down with Venom. All of the characters interact exactly how they always have; it is the reactions to these abnormal situations from the characters that we have grown to love that make this issue worth reading. I think the randomness of the events all work because they tie into the overall story – there are problems with the Great Web which are causing universes to leak into each other. This focus gives every random cameo in the issue a larger purpose than you would at first think. 

I’m also surprised that after 7 issues, Baldeon is still on art – we are well due a lackluster cover artist by this point. You’ve all heard what I’m going to say before about how Baldeon kills it on art so I’ll won’t waste any more time singing songs of praise.

I’m glad that guest stars and story arc are staying around, showing that Costa is in this issue for the long haul (with the current state of comics, that means about 12 issues). Octavia, Lady Spider and Uncle Ben all make appearances, showing that they have a more substantial role in the narrative than I first assumed. I’m glad of this, as Lady Spider has to have been one of the best characters in all of Spider-Verse. She doesn’t get a major role in this issue, but her argument with Ham is still a delight to read.

I even like the little interaction between Anya and Ben about her homework. It was a bit of a touching scene, showing how Anya is filling the void left behind by Mayday. The scene also served to show us that the Warriors have lives outside of the team, something I hope is explored with the other characters.

I’m not going to pretend this is earth-shatteringly good stuff. In fact, it’s about as bizarre as comics come. But what the hell – I damn well enjoyed this issue and I’m definitely giving it an;

A

Worst line: “You’re a vulture, Toomes.” (Really?!)

Spider-Points of Spider-Interest

• So when is Spider-Ham 2099 getting his own solo comic? Or do you have to be Gwen-related to get an ongoing now?
• If Ham-2099’s universe adheres to the same rules of the normal 2099 universe, shouldn’t Doom be an anti-hero, not a villain?
• Did Spider-Punk seriously not find out who Gwen was in Spider-Verse? I seem to remember everyone making a big deal out of who she was back then.