Amazing Spider-Man (Vol. 1) #544 Review

THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #544
TITLE: “One More Day” Part 1
WRITER: J. Michael Straczynski
PENCILER: Joe Quesada
INKER: Danny Miki
COLORIST: Richard Isanove

PLOT:
Aunt May is STILL in the hospital. She’s STILL in a coma with no hope of recovery. Peter and Mary Jane are STILL too broke to keep the machines running. Luckily, the doctor owes one to Spider-Man and he recognizes the Parkers, but they still need to come up with some cash fast lest May be smothered by the cruel market’s invisible hand.
Peter decides to ask Tony Stark, A.K.A. Iron Man, for money. Since their relationship has become a bit strained over the Super Hero Registration issue, our hero does what any rational person would do when asking a former friend for an important favor; he breaks into Stark’s building, kicks his ass, webs him up in an alley, and sends him on a guilt trip. Oddly enough, this tactic doesn’t seem to work at first, but Mr. Stark eventually comes around and sends Jarvis to the hospital with a $2,000,000 check.
Doctor Fine explains that they can make May comfortable, but it isn’t humanly possible to save her life. But “humanly possible” has never been much of a limit for Spider-Man! He swings off into the night, hell bent on finding a way to save his Aunt.

LIKES:

– The best part of this issue is the coloring, which is something I don’t usually notice at all unless it’s done exceptionally well. Everything positively glows, and I bet a coat of polish this thick would make any penciler’s work look great.

– Speaking of pencils, I quite like Quesada’s art. The previews I had seen made me wary at first, but now Peter’s face is the only thing I think is really ugly. Everything else is spiffy, especially the webs. I know a vocal lot of you out there think Joey Q sucks, but he could be much worse.

DISLIKES:

– Sure, this one’s about as entertaining as any JMS issue, but I’m getting tired of the plot only progressing incrementally each month. It’s time for May to either die or get better, because I’m bored of watching Peter and Mary Jane stand around the hospital, spouting the same four or five lines of dialogue.

– If this was last September, then I would have been thrilled just to see Spidey beat Iron Man good and proper, but I’m past that now. I also hate it when heroes are written unrealistically just so they can have an excuse to fight. No matter how desperate Peter is, he should know that a punch to the gut is not the best way to appeal to someone’s sympathies.

– There are only 24 pages of story, but the issue costs four bucks. So what does that extra dollar buy you? For one, you’ll get an encyclopedia-style profile of Spider-Man which summarizes his entire history in six pages of excruciatingly detailed text. I tried really hard to read the whole thing, but it’s too dryly written. There’s also a diagram of Spidey’s organic web-spinners, a gallery of costumes, and a page of art in various stages of completion. Maybe somebody out there is interested in this stuff, but I can’t imagine who that would be. An extra dollar really isn’t enough to quibble over, but the principle of making me pay for something I don’t want is.

MOST HILARIOUSLY PRETENTIOUS QUOTE:

“Tune your ear to the frequency of despair, and cross-reference by the by the longitude and latitude of a heart in agony. Listen. Listen.”

RATING:

3 out of 5. That’s average. I happen to think the average comic book is pretty good these days, so there’s no shame in producing a 3/5 book. There is, however, shame in charging extra for one.

REVIEWED BY: CrazyChris