How to fix Spider-Man without retcons or magic

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CrazyChris
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How to fix Spider-Man without retcons or magic

Post by CrazyChris » Tue Dec 18, 2007 9:33 am

I think most of us agree that a supernatural being flying in to fix all of Spider-Man's problems now that's he's hit rock bottom is a horrible, stupid cop-out. On the other hand, I would argue that the Spider-Man we have right now is broken, and needs to be fixed somehow, whether it be with a cosmic retcon or in some more mundane way.

So I tried to come up with a way to bring Spider-Man back to a sustainable status quo without the use of Mephisto, and here is what I came up with:

Spider-Man is still technically registered under the SHRA, and he has been throughout Civil War, Back in Black, and One More Day. Unlike folks like Captain America who never registered, Spider-Man actually did register before he ran out and joined Cap's resistence. And he never unregistered. Therefore, all this time his legal status has been as a registered super hero and an officer of SHIELD. I assume agents of that level have certain authorizations and immunities that civilians do not, so the "felonies" he commited in the hospital might not have been illegal at all. He might have been working fully within his authority as an operative of the government. If he has violated a law, then it is simply being AWOL for a couple of weeks. With connections like Tony Stark, Peter could get off with a slap on the wrist.

So there's a simple loophole for getting Peter out of being a fugitive. He's entitled to the same amnesty everyone else who fought with Cap recieved, and as a still-technically-registered hero, his heroic actions since then have been legal. He doesn't need to be on the run from the law. He can have a life again with no magical fixes.

Then there's the secret identity. Dan Slott already helped cast doubt within the general public, and so now it is only a matter of building on that doubt, which I'm sure can be done in a number of ways. SHIELD will still know the truth, but that doesn't matter because they have no reason to apprehend him, as I've discussed above. And the criminal underworld? They wouldn't dare go after Peter Parker or his family after the public humiliation the biggest, baddest crime boss of them all recieved for trying to do just that. A few heavy hitters like Doc Ock (who realistically should not be fooled by this after having been fooled by a similar trick before) would still prove problematic, but it isn't like everyone and their mother will be showing up to murder Aunt May. So Peter could actually have a life and not be on the run.

From there, the writers could do anything with Peter. He could get a job. He could teach. He could fight crime legitimately, and still have a (generally) secret identity. The character would be restored, his unmasking would still have real consequences, and no spells would have to be cast.

What do ya'll think?

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Post by WebHeadPDX » Tue Dec 18, 2007 10:22 am

Hey, I like that! From your keyboard to Marvel's inbox, huh?

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Post by spideyjo79 » Tue Dec 18, 2007 11:58 am

We can only wish such logic will be used. Somehow I doubt it. But I can't see any flaws there Chris, looks great to me. Now if we can get Dan Slott to see it and show JQ and JMS, before next week, we might have a chance. I guess if we get another delay for ASM #545, we know who to blame!

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Post by tim_tahoe » Tue Dec 18, 2007 12:27 pm

I like your idea, specifically because it uses what has gone on in his continuity, and doesn't NEED mystical hocus pocus. The writers could start clean, because he isn't wanted by the law, his secret identity is in doubt, and that lends itself to a "starting over" vibe nicely. A good writer could even use all the changes that have been going on in Peter and Mary Jane's life to seperate them. Don't get me wrong, I am for the marriage, but if it is going to be gotten rid of , I'd much rather see it go in a more organic way, not a contrived "deal with the devil". Rather see them together though.

So what I'm saying is, "Make Mine CrazyChris!"
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Post by Venom65437 » Tue Dec 18, 2007 4:10 pm

Uh-oh, you just tried applying logic to Marvel... you better hope JQ doesn't personally come kill you... :shock:
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Re: How to fix Spider-Man without retcons or magic

Post by bdog » Tue Dec 18, 2007 5:54 pm

CrazyChris wrote:I think most of us agree that a supernatural being flying in to fix all of Spider-Man's problems now that's he's hit rock bottom is a horrible, stupid cop-out. On the other hand, I would argue that the Spider-Man we have right now is broken, and needs to be fixed somehow, whether it be with a cosmic retcon or in some more mundane way.

So I tried to come up with a way to bring Spider-Man back to a sustainable status quo without the use of Mephisto, and here is what I came up with:

Spider-Man is still technically registered under the SHRA, and he has been throughout Civil War, Back in Black, and One More Day. Unlike folks like Captain America who never registered, Spider-Man actually did register before he ran out and joined Cap's resistence. And he never unregistered. Therefore, all this time his legal status has been as a registered super hero and an officer of SHIELD. I assume agents of that level have certain authorizations and immunities that civilians do not, so the "felonies" he commited in the hospital might not have been illegal at all. He might have been working fully within his authority as an operative of the government. If he has violated a law, then it is simply being AWOL for a couple of weeks. With connections like Tony Stark, Peter could get off with a slap on the wrist.

So there's a simple loophole for getting Peter out of being a fugitive. He's entitled to the same amnesty everyone else who fought with Cap recieved, and as a still-technically-registered hero, his heroic actions since then have been legal. He doesn't need to be on the run from the law. He can have a life again with no magical fixes.

Then there's the secret identity. Dan Slott already helped cast doubt within the general public, and so now it is only a matter of building on that doubt, which I'm sure can be done in a number of ways. SHIELD will still know the truth, but that doesn't matter because they have no reason to apprehend him, as I've discussed above. And the criminal underworld? They wouldn't dare go after Peter Parker or his family after the public humiliation the biggest, baddest crime boss of them all recieved for trying to do just that. A few heavy hitters like Doc Ock (who realistically should not be fooled by this after having been fooled by a similar trick before) would still prove problematic, but it isn't like everyone and their mother will be showing up to murder Aunt May. So Peter could actually have a life and not be on the run.

From there, the writers could do anything with Peter. He could get a job. He could teach. He could fight crime legitimately, and still have a (generally) secret identity. The character would be restored, his unmasking would still have real consequences, and no spells would have to be cast.

What do ya'll think?
It could work
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Re: How to fix Spider-Man without retcons or magic

Post by sir_dandan » Tue Dec 18, 2007 6:02 pm

CrazyChris wrote:
What do ya'll think?
I think we should fire Joe Q and give you a job.
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Post by sir_dandan » Tue Dec 18, 2007 6:04 pm

tim_tahoe wrote: A good writer could even use all the changes that have been going on in Peter and Mary Jane's life to seperate them.
Maybe pete could dump her as a way to keep her safe now the big baddies know who he is. Send her away under the funding of sheild or something.
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Post by tim_tahoe » Tue Dec 18, 2007 7:53 pm

sir_dandan wrote:
tim_tahoe wrote: A good writer could even use all the changes that have been going on in Peter and Mary Jane's life to seperate them.
Maybe pete could dump her as a way to keep her safe now the big baddies know who he is. Send her away under the funding of sheild or something.
That would be fine, and again wouldn't require a ridiculous decision on Aunt May and the marriage. I would rather see Pete and MJ married and raise a family ala the FF, but I don't deny that there are some good plots that could come out of a single Pete, with MJ dropping in once in a while to confuse and confound him.
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Post by George Berryman » Wed Dec 19, 2007 3:13 pm

sir_dandan wrote: Maybe pete could dump her as a way to keep her safe now the big baddies know who he is. Send her away under the funding of sheild or something.
There's nothing in Spider-Man's history or personality that would make sense for him to "dump" his wife.
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Re: How to fix Spider-Man without retcons or magic

Post by taechunsa » Wed Dec 19, 2007 5:15 pm

CrazyChris wrote:I think most of us agree that a supernatural being flying in to fix all of Spider-Man's problems now that's he's hit rock bottom is a horrible, stupid cop-out. On the other hand, I would argue that the Spider-Man we have right now is broken, and needs to be fixed somehow, whether it be with a cosmic retcon or in some more mundane way.
The easy answer is for them to let go of their attempt to reclaim what Sider-Man used to be and make him into something new and better.

From the solicits for an upcoming Spider-Man.
AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #553-554
More as Spidey battles the threat of Freak and his personal life falls apart around him.
Oh yeah, this will fix it all. What we need are more stories where Peter's personal life falls apart around him. I mean wow! That hasn't happened in a Spider-Man book for at least two or three issues.

The creators, or more likely the editors, need to get this idea that Peter has to constantly have his personal life in turmoil out of their heads. You can only write the same story so many times before people get so sick of it that they move on.

The problem with Joe Q.'s idea that Spider-Man needs a return to the past is that he has never really left it and there is nothing new in the past.

If they really wanted to fix Spider-Man then they would focus on doing something really interesting like not trying to redo old stories and move him to a new place.

Have him find baby May. Move him out of New York. Give MJ powers. Do something original and ground breaking and quit trying to relive the glory days like the high school quarterback who went nowhere and only talks about how good it used to be.

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Post by F.N. Spider-Man » Wed Dec 19, 2007 5:54 pm

Does Peter's moral base and ethical compass allow him to use this loophole?
It has been shown time and again that Peter consistently holds himself accountable for his own actions.

His actions at the hospital were, in his mind, criminal. He willing and knowingly committed them. I'm not sure a technicality provided by S.H.E.I.L.D. is enough to get Pete's character of the hook.

Although he may have been acting within his legal rights, Peter believed he had crossed the line, and therefore considers himself criminal.

The loophole may legally put Pete and Spider-man in the clear, but I doubt that Pete's conscience will absolve him of his criminal actions.
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Post by The Black Cat » Wed Dec 19, 2007 6:36 pm

Oh Cris, how I wish it would be this way instead of the train wreck we are getting subjected to!!!
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Post by CrazyChris » Wed Dec 19, 2007 8:16 pm

F.N. Spider-Man wrote:Does Peter's moral base and ethical compass allow him to use this loophole?
It has been shown time and again that Peter consistently holds himself accountable for his own actions.

His actions at the hospital were, in his mind, criminal. He willing and knowingly committed them. I'm not sure a technicality provided by S.H.E.I.L.D. is enough to get Pete's character of the hook.

Although he may have been acting within his legal rights, Peter believed he had crossed the line, and therefore considers himself criminal.

The loophole may legally put Pete and Spider-man in the clear, but I doubt that Pete's conscience will absolve him of his criminal actions.
That's a good point. Hopefully that's a facet that will be explored, assuming the events at the hospital have still happened after OMD.

In my theory, even if Spider-Man didn't exploit the loophole, maybe Iron Man would. I can see him refusing to prosecute Peter out of guilt.

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Post by F.N. Spider-Man » Thu Dec 20, 2007 10:30 am

If anyone is going to exploit a loophole, it will be Tony Stark.
In recent years I am discovering Tony is kind of backhanded sleaze-ball.
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