Spider-Man: Turn off the Dark

[Mr. Noodle]

a protofeminist stew that foolishly decants the myth of the weaver Arachne into a story that’s incoherent to begin with.


I dunno, I just like that sentence. It has the feel of truth to me, from what I've read.

[George Berryman]

More...

http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id ... _article=1

It would take a superhero to save "Spider-Man," the most costly Broadway show in history, according to first reviews of the mammoth production.

"'Spider-Man' is not only the most expensive musical ever to hit Broadway; it may also rank among the worst," New York Times critic Ben Brantley wrote Tuesday.

After five delays to opening night, a horrific injury to a stunt man and the departure of a lead actress, "Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark" needed to impress.

Instead, critics attending the $65 million production this week are stunned for all the wrong reasons.

"I'm not kidding," the New York Times critic wrote. "After 15 or 20 minutes, the central question you keep asking yourself is likely to change from 'How can $65 million look so cheap?' to 'How long before I'm out of here?'"

The Hollywood Reporter panned the songs, composed by U2's Bono and The Edge, as "underwhelming." And the story suffered from "borderline incoherence."

The Los Angeles Times called the show an out-of-control mess "indulged with too many resources, artistic and financial... The investors of 'Spider-Man' have inadvertently bankrolled an artistic form of megalomania."

The slew of reviews came out overnight coinciding with the scrapped opening date of February 7. Producers now promise the official first night will be March 15, although after five delays critics are not holding their breath.

Despite technical problems, several injuries to actors and Natalie Mendoza's decision in December to quit her role as Arachne, the show actually runs nightly in the form of an extended preview.

The Daily News reported that last month "Spider-Man" was close to sold out, taking in at least 1.3 million dollars a week. There is a question mark over whether an official opening night will ever take place, wrote the News, since that would only provide fodder for more bad publicity.

According to the tabloid, "Spider-Man" lacks nothing in ambition, but everything in coherence.

"A big production going in too many directions and in need of a lot of work to make it entertaining, satisfying and understandable," critic Joe Dziemianowicz wrote in the Daily News.

"Surprises do happen on Broadway. Let's hope they get the tangles out."

[Black]

This show is like the mother of all train wrecks. It just keeps going and going. The energizer bunny can't keep up this pace.

[Kevin Cushing]

Here's a round-up of reviews, including statements from the shows spokesman which are pretty damn hilarious:

The PILE-ON by the critics was ridiculous and uncalled for. Their actions are unprecedented and UNCOOL!

Ooo, they're all-caps uncool, huh? Strong words. For a third grade playground.

http://robot6.comicbookresources.com/2011/02/big-budget-spider-man-musical-turns-off-the-critics/

[George Berryman]

[Kevin Cushing]

And now from a producer of the show:

Any of the people who review the show and say it has no redeeming value are just not legitimate reviewers, period...It’s hard to have people that don’t get pop culture reviewing a pop culture event, isn’t it?

So, in the face of stiff criticism, the spokesman for and producer of this show basically say "No fair!" and "You suck!" Evidently they've been trained by the same savvy PR people that trained so many of their counterparts at Marvel Comics...

http://popwatch.ew.com/2011/02/08/spider-man-producer-critics/

[spidertour02]

And now from a producer of the show:

Any of the people who review the show and say it has no redeeming value are just not legitimate reviewers, period...It’s hard to have people that don’t get pop culture reviewing a pop culture event, isn’t it?

So, in the face of stiff criticism, the spokesman for and producer of this show basically say "No fair!" and "You suck!" Evidently they've been trained by the same savvy PR people that trained so many of their counterparts at Marvel Comics...

WAIT WAIT WAIT ... The official response from the producers of the show is to question the legitimacy of professional theater reviewers? You know, the only people that should be expected to actually understand what this clusterfuck is supposed to be doing and view it on a level detached from the subject matter alone?

[Two-Bit Specialist]

I'm in the minority here, but I still kinda hope the production gets its act together (no pun intended) and makes for a very entertaining spectacle (the good kind).

[George Berryman]

And now from a producer of the show:

Any of the people who review the show and say it has no redeeming value are just not legitimate reviewers, period...It’s hard to have people that don’t get pop culture reviewing a pop culture event, isn’t it?

So, in the face of stiff criticism, the spokesman for and producer of this show basically say "No fair!" and "You suck!" Evidently they've been trained by the same savvy PR people that trained so many of their counterparts at Marvel Comics...

They're starting to sound like Marvel editors. "The problem isn't with us - it's with you!"

[gregxb]

[Aziz]

I'm one to think stage plays are a waste of time, never go to a place like that, especially if the show is a musical
Anyone here reminded of the Batman Musical from the episode of Ra's AlGhul in the body of his daughter? I agree with Bruce on the use of the word Schwarbage

[Drewr15]

I am going next weekend - the 19th - my wife got them for me for christmas. I will let everyone know what I think of it.

[Kevin Cushing]

Man, the sharks are really circling. The state of New York issued the show 2 safety violations and will continue inspections to make sure they're following safety requirements.

http://robot6.comicbookresources.com/2011/02/spider-man-musical-cited-for-two-safety-violations-skewered-by-snl/

And that article also posted a pretty funny SNL skit. A mock law firm commercial for "Gublin & Green," specializing in injuries sustained from Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark

[jpd13]

Man, the sharks are really circling. The state of New York issued the show 2 safety violations and will continue inspections to make sure they're following safety requirements.

http://robot6.comicbookresources.com/2011/02/spider-man-musical-cited-for-two-safety-violations-skewered-by-snl/

And that article also posted a pretty funny SNL skit. A mock law firm commercial for "Gublin & Green," specializing in injuries sustained from Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark

Priceless.

[gregxb]